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Disability, Chronic Illness, and Spirituality

When I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosiscontext of disability is sparse, many
in the mid 1980's as a "diagnosis ofthoughtful writers have considered religion
exclusion" (see, my illness had beenand spirituality to be crucial factors in
mis-diagnosed for about 25 years prior toadjustment to disability. BUT, we must be
this initial "diagnosis") I became VERY angrycareful not to "blame" God, as I did, or to
with God. "Why me", I asked. Why did I havesay that my disability is "God's Will, or
to be the one you inflicted with thispunishment for something that I did". Saying
terrible disease? Why couldn't you let thethese things isn't taking responsibility for
Doctors conclusively diagnose the condition?our lives and figuring out how to live a
Why did I have to keep pretending that thebetter life by managing symptoms. Instead,
Doctors were mistaken, just so that I couldbecome reconnected with whatever spiritual
live  my  day-to-day  life?process/religion that you find speaks to you,
and live in the present with all of the gifts
I was asking the wrong question, you see.that you still have. Being affiliated with a
Instead of asking "Why me, God?", I shouldspecific religion can sometimes help those of
have been asking, "Why NOT me, God?" See, Ius with disabilities find comfort in times of
was trying to become the "before theisolation  and  despair.
diagnosis" me, and I just could not do it.
So, I went into denial, and pretended thatWhile little research has been conducted on
nothing was wrong. And, as anyone who isthe influence of organized religion in the
disabled, or who is living with a chroniccontext of disability, studies on the general
condition can tell you, living with apopulation have been positive. For example, a
disability is hard enough without trying to28-year follow-up of thousands of people aged
become a pale image of who one might have18-65 years found that the individuals who
been without the disability, i.e., trying toattended at least weekly religious services
fit into a world designed by and forhad lower rates of depression, smoking, and
able-bodied individuals, most of whom arealcohol use; they also tended to have greater
equally dispirited. It took me quite a whilesocial support. Frequent attendees were more
(about 10 years, actually) to come to thelikely to have engaged in other healthy
conclusion that I needed to stop being inbehaviors, including physical exercise. The
denial; I needed to accept the condition,effect on survival was good after other
learn how to manage symptoms, and get on withfactors were taken into consideration - their
a quality life. Indeed, I needed to ask, "Whyrisk  of  death  was  reduced  by  34%.
not me God!" For living in denial meant that
the ILLNESS DEFINED ME; I was very unhappy; IWhen disability is integrated as another
was seperated from my spirituality; I wasdimension of living, spiritual growth can
alone; and, I contributed to disruptivetake place. Please reread this red phrase
events  in  my  life.again. It talks about integrating a
disability or a chronic condition "as anothe
It may sound corney, but I used my illnessdimension of living"! It means, taking back
disability experience as an opportunity tocontrol of your life; actually "living"
get in touch with the needs of my "trueagain, and managing symptoms as part of every
self". That is, I decided to use thisday life! AND, believe me, this is not easy!
opportunity to take back control over myIf you have the opportunity to acquire the
life; to recommit to my spirituality; toDisabilitykey Workbook, you will see that I
discover and live a quality life; and, touse my actual condition as an example for
keep replenishing my "well" of personalothers to follow. Whenever I have to focus on
happiness and satisfaction by reaching out tomy "Multiple Sclerosis Symptom Impairment
others in similar situations. I mean, whoMatrix", I get depressed all over again. My
better to discuss about living with a chronicbrother felt bad about asking me about his
illness than someone who does so on a daily"condition" because he felt that it was
basis, and not just some Researcher? WhoNOTHING compared to what I cope with (more
better to create a Workbook (found at toabout his question in further blogs). BUT, I
assist others obtain disability insurances toonly concentrate on the symptom process when
which they are entitled than someone who usedI need to. Otherwise, I concentrate on
the process herself, and not just asymptom management, and on daily living as
theoretical social services person? Whoquality  a  life  as  I  can.
better to create a website and an online blog
where we of similar condition can chat with,Integrating experiences of disability allows
and learn about extending our quality of lifea person with a disability to recognize that
than  someone  practicing each and every day?suffering and hurtful experiences are
universal conditions. It can be a time for
Does my spirituality help me in theseyou to discover untapped resources; it can be
endeavors? You bet it does! Spirituality is aa time where you decide that you DO HAVE TIME
quality that goes beyond involvement in aTO play with your grandchildren, or read that
religious organization. It is a more basicbook you have been putting off, or research
construct. The highest level of ouryour grandparents as they came to America
development is affected by our ability tolong  ago.
appreciate the sacred in life; to live each
day with purpose, and to find a sense ofSpirituality is a way for people with
meaning and purpose for our lives.disabilities to fulfill their potential and
Spirituality invites each of us withdiscover the possibilities while learning to
disabilities and/or dealing with a chroniclive with and integrate their
condition to live fully and in the present -disability-related limitations and yet expand
in REALITY, the here and now. Not in denial,their boundaries to experience the fullness
but in control of our lives, learning about,of  life.
managing,  and  living  each  day in quality!
As part of my Internet research for this
Research suggests that people, and inblog, I found the following website entitled
particular persons with disability, depend on"Faithability Religion, Spirituality and
spirituality and religion as an important, ifDisability Resources". You can subscribe to
not primary, method of coping with physicalthe site, for free, and receive (I think - I
health problems and life stress. Mosthaven't gotten anything yet) periodic
research, however, has addressed one'sinformation. The site looked interesting, so
involvement in religion rather thanhere  it  is:
spirituality.
Once again, your comments, thoughts, and
Although research about spirituality in theideas on this and other blogs are welcomed!



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