How to Be Appropriately Pushy

One of the things that's often hard to know ispushiness, in that Lazaro used the opportunity as
how and when to be pushy appropriately. In thesemuch as he could, but then was completely
hardscrabble times, perfectly polite people don'trespectful and gracious. It is also evidence that a
stand much of a chance of getting what theyletter works, especially when delivered under
want. However, not enough can be said forunique circumstances. Designer Michael Kors was a
making yourself known in a decent andstore clerk, he sold Calvin Klein a ski jacket, and
unobnoxious manner. The key is to use yourstuffed his design sketches into the sleeve as the
intuition and your brain, both at the same time,jacket was en route to delivery. A documentary
and pray for a little luck.film director I know who needed a quote from a
When Lazaro Hernandez was a fashion student atfamous director to help her get grants pulled a
Parson's School of Design in New York, he had asimilar coup. She found out where Woody Allen
chance encounter in an airport with Anna Wintour,lived, then had a copy of her latest film delivered
editor in chief of Vogue Magazine. In fact, sheto his door with a handwritten note requesting a
was getting on his airplane. Lazaro wasn't so surefavorable comment. He obliged.
he had the nerve to approach, but one hour intoEveryone has to start somewhere, even the rich
the flight, he could stand it no longer.and famous. So if you can approach politely,
Lazaro wrote a humble note on an airsick bag,preferably through some other means than the
which explained that he was a fashion studentfront office, your efforts will probably not be
who would soon be looking for an internship. Heseen as pushy but as what one does to get a
noted that she probably got requests like this allbreak.
the time, but wondered if perhaps someone hadPart of the reason this works is the honesty
given her a chance at the beginning of her career.involved. You are telling them what you need up
He also wrote that he knew she had the powerfront. So this is very different than talking up a
to help him. Then, trembling, he approached.potential contact at a cocktail party with the sole
Lazaro stood before Ms. Wintour's seated figure,agenda of having them look at your work, or
and said her name. No answer. He repeated herhanging out a health club frequented by a certain
name several times. No answer. He even crossedstar so you can add them to your list of influential
the uncrossable boundary and touched her arm.friends. Those would be considered inappropriate
Still no reply. Finally, he left his plea under her'covert agenda' moves that are really looked
martini glass and crept back to his seat. Severaldown upon by the rich and powerful.
months later, he received a call from a majorToo often we assume that the way to approach
designer who'd gotten Lazaro's letter from Ms.an industry or a leader is from the bottom,
Wintour with instructions that it was not to beworming your way up through the ranks. A much
ignored. A subsequent interview proved that hemore effective approach is just to go straight to
had talent, and Lazaro was hired for his firstthe top, where you very well may connect with
internship.the person who can make everything happen for
Lazaro not only had great luck to get on anyou. This is why letters are such a good tool for
airplane with the most powerful woman in theapproaching these people. They can read it in their
fashion industry, he had the savvy to make useown time, they're not too obtrusive, and if
of the opportunity. He was ready when his breakwell-written and delivered in a subtle but
came with a portfolio of samples he'd workedattention-getting way, they can work wonders.
hard on, making it the best it could be. Then heImportant people, just like the rest of us, do not
did the most important thing of all: he sent Ms.like to be used. On the other hand, most people
Wintour a thank you note, which prompted a faxdo like to be helpful, and a direct request can be
from the woman herself saying she was glad it allamazingly effective.
worked out.©2004 Suzanne Falter-Barns. Reprint
This to me is a fine example of well-handledpermission available.