| Character is a word that is well talked about both | | | | character. When there is an audience, people tend |
| in the business and professional spheres. It is a | | | | to show face, tailor their actions, watch habits and |
| reference to the personality of an individual, the | | | | even watch their own words for that period. That |
| qualities and attributes unique and distinctive to | | | | is perception or reputation management. Catch |
| the individual. This is who the person is in the | | | | the same person unawares, singing explicit lyrics |
| absence of an audience. This is what an individual | | | | and doing the unimaginable. That is the real person |
| sees when they place a mirror in front. There are | | | | not what you see advertised. Those little habits |
| many things that shape or build character either | | | | compounded together are strong bricks that are |
| for the good or bad. Some character traits can | | | | building your character. You easily become familiar |
| be re-modeled and turned around for good. When | | | | with something you do regularly. Take stock of |
| you are aware of some of the building blocks to | | | | those little habits on your own. You are the best |
| your character, you will become more deliberate | | | | assessor of yourself as you can afford to be |
| and intentional about building your own personality. | | | | true to yourself about it without taking offense. |
| You will be cautious and aware of what makes | | | | Stand in the mirror and take note of those little |
| you the person you are. The reason behind is to | | | | things. Until you make a decision to change the |
| make sure your character is sound, stable and full | | | | habits, your character will be enshrined and |
| of integrity. Your character shapes people's | | | | embodied by what you do. |
| perception and association they put to your name. | | | | 6. The Associations and Relationships you create - |
| Your name can gain the influence necessary when | | | | Every human being has an intrinsic desire to |
| you have a noble character. Your name can buy | | | | network or reach out to those around. It is in our |
| better than your cash. Your reputation counts in | | | | associations that we get to learn a lot on life. |
| your dealings with humanity. | | | | Advice from a friend is sometimes more valued |
| The 10 Bricks | | | | than from any other person including a relative. |
| 1. Your past experiences (background & | | | | Friends normally have some things in common. It |
| upbringing) - The things you are drive towards in | | | | is rare for people with different and diverse |
| life are usually those things you grew up exposed | | | | interests to be close to each other. Friends spend |
| to. You can only go as far as your exposure can | | | | time, talking and playing together. It is in the |
| take you both on good or bad behavior. I have | | | | process that one learns new things. What have |
| seen many who have grown in environments | | | | you become since your become friends with that |
| where alcohol was abused and under intense | | | | person? What were you before that you may |
| verbal and physical abuse of family members. The | | | | have otherwise lost? When you part with your |
| character traits tended to follow the same | | | | friends do you become someone else you are |
| pattern even through school. I had a bully of a | | | | not when with them? Be real. |
| friend in school whose home environment was | | | | 7. Your Psycho-Social Spiritual Involvement - Your |
| exactly how he lived his life. He valued beating | | | | own spiritual connections have values and beliefs |
| other people for fun. It became his character | | | | they hold on to dearly. These are beliefs you mix |
| block. It goes without saying that if you were not | | | | or used to formulate or align your own values. |
| exposed to violent behavior you are less likely | | | | There are general character expectations |
| going to become violent than one who | | | | expected of certain social or spiritual gifts. They |
| experienced it every day. Expose your children to | | | | are sometimes governed by rules and regulations, |
| the correct character values and traits and they | | | | codes of conduct, commandments, policies and |
| will naturally grow into that. | | | | procedures etc. The condition is that for someone |
| 2. The feeding of the mind (mental diet) - Your | | | | to be a part of any social or spiritual group there |
| mind is the engine room for your character. You | | | | is an apparent expectation that he/she adheres |
| become what you think about most of the time. | | | | to the given expectations. There are traits and |
| You think about the things you feed your mind | | | | attributes one may carry in life but as soon as |
| with. The mind is always hungry and serious about | | | | someone joins the group, the character |
| creating thoughts. Thoughts graduate in beliefs, | | | | expectations dictate how a member must behave |
| actions, habits, into character and ultimately a | | | | both in the personal life. |
| lifestyle. We feed our minds by the things we | | | | 8. Your Verbal Produce - Your mouth has |
| watch and read. The television shows we watch | | | | capacity to produce the bad and the good. What |
| the websites we visit, the books and magazines | | | | you speak on is something you have internalized. |
| we read all feed the mind. Since the mind is the | | | | When you speak about something so often, you |
| seedbed of character, it is vital to feed the mind | | | | will soon belief and become it. It is always good to |
| with the correct diet. You get what you feed | | | | come up with affirmations that you read out loud |
| your mind with. You cannot expect good to come | | | | to yourself over and over again until they |
| out of garbage. Garbage into the mind, Garbage | | | | become part of your confession and second |
| will be displayed in the form of personality or | | | | nature. Affirmations are about speaking something |
| character. As you watch what you eat physically, | | | | that is not as though it is happening in the present. |
| watch what you feed your mind subconsciously. | | | | You say it while attaching all the emotion and |
| 3. The Counsel you entertain - It is important to | | | | focus that goes with it. Begin to feel you have |
| receive council from people you look up to such | | | | received what you are talking about. It creates in |
| as mentors and heroes in your domain. Everyone | | | | you a sense of achievement and as you continue |
| needs a significant other that can speak into their | | | | to carry this attitude, you become what you are |
| lives. People you hold with high esteem and regard | | | | talking about. Total character change for the |
| can easily model bad character. You can easily | | | | better. Say things like "I am a person of integrity, |
| think that it is alright to behave in a certain | | | | I am resolute and make my decisions wisely, I |
| manner because you see your mentor doing it, | | | | am compassionate and loving, I am honest with |
| you see your Pastor condoning it, you see all your | | | | myself and with others, I have great respect in |
| leaders speaking well of it, your personal life coach | | | | my community and country...." Just keep going. |
| advocates for it. Always judge the counsel you | | | | Write those attitudes you want not talk about the |
| get. Is this building me to become a better person | | | | ones you want to change. |
| or I am being dragged to become another person | | | | 9. Your Decisions & Standards you set - What |
| I never wanted to be. You have the right to | | | | you settle for in life can shape your character and |
| shape your own character. | | | | attitudes. It all boils down to choice at the end of |
| 4. The Values you enact - A personal value | | | | the day. What you choose to become is usually |
| system is necessary in the formulation of true | | | | what you begin to work towards. You do not just |
| character. People can preach to you about good | | | | become a certain type of person until you make |
| behavior but you certainly lean towards the | | | | a choice, or decision to become that person. |
| values you hold dearly to your own heart. It is | | | | Choices are pivotal in shaping character. We can |
| easy to judge a person's character based on the | | | | give you all the benefits of having a certain type |
| values they uphold. Do you uphold honesty, | | | | of character but if you have not internal buy-in |
| integrity, family etc? Come up with your value | | | | you remain where you are or choose to become |
| system. It will generally tell everyone about your | | | | the exact opposite. Your character is shaped by |
| character without you having to raise your voice | | | | your exposure. Your standards are fashioned by |
| to convince anyone about it. Always revisit your | | | | your level of awareness. |
| value system seeking to check on the actual real | | | | 10. Your Vulnerability & Accountability Willingness - |
| tangible value you get from upholding such values. | | | | The building of good character traits happens in a |
| Bear in mind that you enact or come up with | | | | position of vulnerability and accountability. You will |
| your own value system. It is important to | | | | only be helped to the degree of your willingness |
| however bring these to light in the institution of | | | | to receive the help. Character excellence is birthed |
| marriage because people usually get married | | | | when you allow external parties to know what |
| without synchronizing value systems. In the end | | | | you are going through for the purpose of being |
| both sides always get surprised and think the | | | | assisted and setup for success. You need an |
| other party has weird priorities resulting in | | | | accountability partner, someone that can tell you |
| frustration. | | | | as it is without you being offended. You have to |
| 5. The Habits you become familiar with - Those | | | | be willing to tell the truth. Accountability setups |
| seemingly little things that you do naturally when | | | | hold information in confidence, nothings goes out |
| you have no one looking at you are building your | | | | to third parties. |