Experiencing a Bar Vitzvah

Bar Mitzvah! What an experience! It is one thingBar Mitzvah. Again, walking into the temple I
that will always be remembered as a uniquenoted the same atmosphere as the night before.
experience for me. My first exposure to JewishBright, happy, and noisy! The ceremony was
life was after moving to Austin and attainingsimilar to the synagogue in some sense, with the
many clients and friends of Jewish faith. My nextimmediate and extended family participating in the
exposure was the opportunity to study Judaism inservice by reading of the Torah, the procession
History of World Religions class. Furthermore, twothrough the congregation with the Torah, the Bar
of my spiritual partners, Stan and Mel, are Jewish.Mitzvah speaking to the congregation and the
For a gentile, I was catapulted very quickly intoparents speaking to him. The difference was that
something I didn't know about.most of the service was in English, with the
The first Bar Mitzvah I went to was atexception of the reading of the Torah and some
Congregation Agudas Archim with one of myof the singing by the Cantor in the most angelic
spiritual partners. Mel invited me to go with himvoice I have ever heard. There was no Cantor at
and I was thrilled. Mel was also the sponsor of thethe synagogue.
young man. I was informed by Mel that theAfter the completion of the service, (in both
service started at ten in the morning, however,cases) blessings were made over wine and bread
that time was only for the religious people, and Ibefore the Kiddush luncheon. The luncheon at the
could be there about fifteen to twenty minutestemple was wonderful with traditional Jewish
past ten. Being late is unusual for me, but Ifoods (bagels and lox, kugel and latke). They
complied.were all foods that I was familiar with, make, and
On my arrival, I was greeted by young ushers. Idid not realize that they were Jewish! After
walked in and spotted Mel. He motioned me overpicking up our food in buffet style my husband
and I stood beside him. Mel gave me a book andand I decided to sit at an empty table with the
indicated the page number. Well, that is when theidea of "seeing who will show up at our table."
"difference" began!Soon three elderly couples sat with us. After
To my embarrassment I could not figure out theintroductions they realized that we were not
book. It was always upside down! I kept flipping itJewish. The welcome from them was nothing I
over, turning it around, and I still wasn't getting it.had experienced before. It was very warm,
Mel explained that in Hebrew, the writing is fromloving, and spiritual. They made sure that we
left to right as are the page numbers. We had awere honored guests in their temple.
good laugh about my embarrassment andDinner and dancing in the evening are "something
proceeded to listen to the service.to remember"! What a party! The reception at
I listened and immediately realized that it was inthe Four Seasons Hotel started with cocktails and
Hebrew, with very little English. I could read alongappetizers, followed by a wonderful three course
in English which I did and found the Torah lessonmeal. Seating arrangements were prearranged by
of great interest as it portrayed the dietary lawsthe family so we could sit with people we knew
of Jewish life. Finding my reading was much fasteror have a common bond. The decorations were
than the lesson being read, I had an opportunityfabulous, and a live band played throughout the
to observe the surroundings! As I looked around, Inight. There were approximately twohundred and
noted that most of the congregation was maleseventy five people there, which one hundred of
and had similar characteristics! Immediately thethose being school mates (Jewish and Gentile) of
stereotype of a Jewish male was made known toZach. The atmosphere was "high," with much
me, and I looked at Mel, and sure enough helaughing and dancing. Zach and the immediate
looked like all the rest of them! The few womenfamily were of great attention throughout the
that were there had same features anddancewith many traditions performed. One was
characteristics. The atmosphere was solemn andthe Hora where the Bar Mitzvah and each
somewhat dark in nature. The congregation wasmember of the immediate family are raised up on
there for one purpose and that was to receivea chair and the guests dance around them.
the lesson of the day.Another tradition was that the father whirled
After the ceremony Mel took me to the Ark andaround each of the immediate family member,
showed me the Torah, explained symbols in theholding either end of a handkerchief while the
synagogue, and answered many questions. Thisguests danced around them. It is not known when
whole experience was new to me and one tothese traditions originated or the meaning, but it
remember.certainly created a lot of hype and fun.
One month later I had an opportunity again toIt is difficult to put into words the feeling I get
participate in another Bar Mitzvah, this time atfrom this experience. Fortunately, I discussed the
Congregation Beth Israel. This time the son of myrituals that were performed over the weekend
other spiritual partner, Stan, became a Barwith my Jewish friends as well as read about the
Mitzvah and I was invited to the completetraditions, customs and values so I would be
weekend celebration which started with theprepared for the experience. Even so, it was
Shabbat Service Friday. Upon entering the templeoverwhelming for me but in an exciting way.
I immediately noted the difference between theMany aspects of the Jewish way of life portray
synagogue and temple. The sanctuary wasdiversity, joy, and personal fulfillment fitting into a
different, the atmosphere was different, thewhole life. This experience gives me a better
energy was different. Many women were inunderstanding of my two spiritual partners, their
attendance, bright colors were worn, and thereway of life, and how they fit into my life. This
was happy chatter and hugging going on. A fewexperience also gave me a confirmation that
men wore the Yarmulke and I noted only onealthough my spiritual partners are of a different
man wearing the Tallit. (At the synagogue only afaith and walk of life from me, there are many
few men did not wear either.)parallels, and we are connected by one Higher
Saturday morning, during the Sabbath Service,Power, Source, Spirit, God.
was the actual ceremony where Zach became