The Precious Gift of Silence

From a sermon given on October 26th 1997and emerge as healthy and vital.
At a worship service in Newport, RII was able to see my bone marrow as a
Two weeks from now marks the 3rd anniversarymetaphor for my life. I spent a great deal of time
of a bone marrow transplant I received to savetransferring my sense of my bone marrow  -
my life from Acute Leukemia. My donor is stillthe very core of my body being diseased  - and
anonymous to me. I want to dedicate what I amasked my self in the silent moments “What is
about to say to him. I don't know if years fromcore in my life that needs to die and become
now I will still be talking about this event in my life,reborn”? I discovered from listening in the
but for now it is still not very far from my dailystillness that I had been injecting a core belief into
consciousness and it is because of the events ofevery interaction, every relationship, every good
the last four years, that many aspects of meor bad circumstance that nothing would ever
have died (including my own bone marrow  - thework out for me. That I was a victim of this and
very core of my body) and along with it oldthat no matter how hard I tried or worked (and I
wounds, pain, core beliefs and habitual thinking.  Itworked hard), or visualized, an abundant life would
would take me literally days to relay to you allforever allude me. I then realized I could make
that I learned from the experience of healing mythe choice to design a new belief that would
life while undergoing treatment for Leukemiareplace the old malfunctioning one. While my bone
which resulted in over 10,000 hours of needing tomarrow was dying and being reborn, the roots of
be basically still and quiet either in isolation in aa life time of emotional pain could now be dug up
hospital room or recovering at home, much ofto be replaced with the joyous affirmation:
the time alone. However,  I'm going to shareEverything always works out for me, even in
now, a few precious morsels of wisdom I gaineddeath! This became my daily mantra. Infused with
along with a quote and a poem, the writers ofthis thought, the healing of body, mind and spirit
each being much more eloquent than I could everbegan.
be.Although my body was dying, I was coming alive.
In his book, The Sacred Hub: Living in the RealMy spirit was breaking free and ego was being
Self, Robert Rabbin relates great wisdom in atransformed into a heightened awareness of
very little story:reality and it's ultimate beauty.
"A Buddhist Monk was taken to hear the BostonAs I recovered from the bone marrow
Symphony perform Beethoven's 5th Symphony.transplant, I continued to have the luxury of
When it was over, the monk cried out, "Noteternal time. I say eternal because I could not
enough Silence!"foresee myself being the doing addict ever again.
Rabbin goes on to instruct:Everyday was like forever. The anti-rejection
"We should become friends with silence. Silencedrugs were intense. I was tired. I was extremely
helps us to see the seductive power of our ownweak. Muscles had atrophied. I was in and out of
justifications, the way we become sure and proudthe hospital with life threatening infections and
of our ideas and positions, our views and ourpneumonia.
solutions. Silence is the communion we call love.Once the hospital stays were over, I began to
Silence is in the heart of all things."explore the freedom of making choices about
He goes on to say:how I was going to spend my time based on
"We are embraced by silence and silence caresimpulse, my body's readiness and desire. I had all
for us deeply. In the embrace of silence we sensethe time in the world. As my body regenerated I
the essence of living things radiating loudly. We fallfelt new strength and new health. I was emerging
into this subtle awareness and are cleansed offrom the silence. Slowly, I crept back out into the
bitterness and fear.  In silence, everything justworld. I had new vision. All of creation was
happens, without manipulation, without fear andwondrous. I could stare at a blooming flower for
grasping. But this happening occurs only in silence."minutes marveling at the miracle of color and
When I began the arduous journey of Leukemiatexture and shape and elegance. When I moved
treatment which resulted in 7 months of hospitalto Newport in the middle of all this, because of
stays and recovery over a period of 2 1/2 years,my family's generosity, I was able to live right on
my first recognition was that I was given thethe harbor, with an immense lawn right outside
opportunity to finally slow down. 4 years ago, Imy back door leading to the water. I stood
had an appointment book that was so full, I wasbarefoot in the lush grass feeling the body of the
actually anxious about taking the time to brushearth connected to my own body and again
my teeth in the morning for fear I wouldn't getwould enter the silence which now was a trusted
everything done! I was a doing addict.friend and which I knew would always lead me to
In one full sweep of a day I had no morethat luscious state of gratitude, compassion and
appointments except with doctors, nurses,love.
various procedures and tests, and to my horror,More months were spent appreciating the
all were scheduled in their time frame, not mine!insignificance of my tiny life and yet the
Very quickly I was to learn that if I didn't let goimmensity of it in its connection to all life, all lives
of my compulsion to control my environment, Iand that which I cannot see but can just feel. I
would surely go crazy or worse, get in the waybegan the practice of yoga and would cry almost
of Nature's healing powers and a possible cure. Iteveryday during practice or in class when I felt
was then that I realized that every moment couldsurges of energy – the life force filling my
be an appointment with The Great Mystery (whatbody with an intensity I had never experienced.
many call God) because I no longer had anyDuring my drives to New York City for my
control over what my body was going to do. If Imedical check-ups, I was fascinated by my ability
had any chance of surviving at all, I was nowto go exactly 50-55 miles an hour for three hours
going to have to turn my life over to experts Iwithout a radio or CD. Quiet – just watching
didn’t even know… and to The Greatthe trees and the terrain go by. It is no accident
Mystery.that peace and quiet go together! 
Now I could focus on going inward. Time nowIt is two years later. My life is new. And now I
seemed like an eternity. The only thing left to dohave more energy than I ever had. In two years
about time was to live it moment by moment. AsI have not stopped creating. I am watching
my body and bone marrow began to destructmyself manifest. My purpose is clear – to
and I began to feel sicker and sicker as aassist others in discovering their authentic nature
consequence of the heavy doses of– to use crisis, disease, illness or transition as
chemotherapy, I had no choice but to slow downtransformational guideposts. And to keep
more and more and more. With very few livingdiscovering where my own path leads. I am
blood cells left in my body, my body becamelearning anew from a different perspective (one
very still and quiet.of health) how to enter that quiet place – that
In this new quietness, I was able to move deepersilence – the slow turtle like pace where all
into a very profound silence especially at night. Inthat is begins. Where my heart knows God.
this deep place was the most exquisite feeling ofRobert Rabbin gives us another pearl:
gratitude. This feeling had eluded me for almost“We cannot hear silence, we become silence.
my entire life. Now that I was near death, andTo become silence, we must enter silence. We
steeped in the mystery of whether I would comecan enter through the narrow gap between two
out of this ordeal alive, I finally discovered thethoughts. We can also enter through that still point
bliss I always knew existed but hadn't a clue howwhere our breath is perfectly at rest between
to achieve. Gratitude is a beautiful and veryinhalation and exhalation. And back again”.
fulfilling experience. It swells the heart with love. II can do this when I slow myself down. But now I
was grateful for so many things. The view ofhave to be reminded. And I find reminders in the
NYC's Central Park just outside my window andmost unlikely places! Just yesterday I was pouring
the vast green that went as far as the eye couldwater from my kitchen faucet. A water saving
see. The daily visits and phone calls from family,device had been installed years ago. Not much
friends and people I hadn't spoken to or heardwater pressure. And as if the flow wasn’t
from in more than thirty years. My doctor'sslow enough, we installed a water filter. It has its
grandfatherly warmth and sense of humor. All theown faucet. Much narrower than the original. It
people who donated platelets so that my bodytook forever to fill a glass. I found myself getting
wouldn't hemorrhage. The chemicals that enteredimpatient. The doing addict was trying to take
my body destroying almost every cell so as toover. I could feel my body constrict. It was really
clear the way for healthy new life to emerge.uncomfortable. Then I remembered! “Oh, now
Grateful for the opportunity to watch mythis is teaching me to slow down”. And I felt
thoughts rise and fall, to feel my body move inmy feet on the ground. I allowed gravity to take
and out of discomfort, the opportunity of choiceover and sunk into it. “Ahhh, I surrender. This
and free will. Grateful for The Greatfeels better. There’s nothing else but the here
Mystery’s wondrous creations and myand now”. I got interested in the water flow
partnership in that.and the miracle it is.
I had been given a disease that would most“How does this relate to my life?” you
probably kill me and I was grateful?might be asking. “How can I apply this to my
Because I went inward and found bliss in silence.own experience?”
This to me is what worship truly is. AnI am not suggesting you get a life threatening
acknowledgment of the glory of creation anddisease in order to heal your life, to love life or to
choice. And in our own hearts we find it. Icommune with God. But there are things you can
discovered that in my own heart, everything Ido every day to remind yourself of your
ever prayed for was there. This worship, thisessence, to enter into that solitary place where
proclamation of holiness (that which is whole)wounds of the past have no place - where past
heals lives in the most profound way. Because itand future are non existent. Just here and now
brings us in to the here and now with fullreality. The precious present. There are so many
acceptance. There is no past. There is no future.ways – so many paths. And if you really
Only wholeness in the now.listen, you will know what is right for you.
It was during this experience that I was able toYou’ll be able to see the guideposts. It’s
accept my mother's love completely for the firstall there. You just need to pay attention. One
time. After a lifetime of pushing her away - oftenthing you can do right now. Take a day off. A
with callousness and lack of compassion - becausereal day off. Not because you’re sick; not
of anger at her controlling behavior and a fearbecause you need a mental health day; not
that my very being would be swallowed up bybecause you have too much to do and need the
her invasiveness, I finally chose to experience herday to catch up; not to take care of somebody
love and be embraced by it. And of course Ielse. But to experiment with what it is to be just
embraced her with mine. This was the end of ouryourself and let the world go on without you
past. It's really over. Today I sit in her lap and call– to go slow enough to notice. To notice your
her mommy. I give her big hugs and kisses. Ibreath, your heartbeat, your thoughts, your
cherish her physical closeness and warmth and Idiscomfort, your pain, your fear, your resistance,
laugh when she is not behaving as the Goddess Iyour compulsion, your noisiness, your nature, your
know she is.  And as we grow closer andlove, your uniqueness, your life, how it came to
continue listening to and learning from each other,be – what you are creating – what’s
we are both maturing together with mutualsill in the way of your freedom.
respect and acknowledgement that we arePerhaps Rumi, the great Afghani 13th century
treasures in each other's lives. This is what Imystic and poet says it best:
would call a miracle.Inside this new love, die.
I learned that the body is a temple of wisdomYour way begins on the other side.
and a great teacher. Because there was nothingBecome the sky.
left to do on days when I would be alone forTake an axe to the prison wall.
hours, I explored the ever-changing waves ofEscape.
feeling and sensation that were sometimesWalk out like someone suddenly born into color.
extremely uncomfortable and learned how toDo it now.
replace judgement with acceptance. There was aYou’re covered with a thick cloud.
newfound awareness of the difference betweenSlide out the side. Die.
need and want. I paid attention to the vibrationsAnd be quiet. Quietness is the surest sign that
of the sensations and let my body speak throughyou’ve died.
rippling sound and movements which wereYour old life was a frantic running from silence.
expressed through my voice and on days when IThe speechless full moon
was strong enough through dance. This I knewComes out now.
intuitively would assist the new cells to be born